(Before I begin, let me say that this post is not meant to make fun of all people of a … certain age. It’s just meant to make fun of the Indiana Jones character and the fact that he is now … of a certain age. I have a deep long-standing fondness for Harrison Ford, as those of you who knew me in my younger years might remember. Him — and Brad Pitt. Poor Harrison is getting a bit long in the tooth, but Brad Pitt… Let’s just say that I recently saw a picture of him and Angelina Jolie at some Hollywood shindig where Ms. Jolie was showing off her new baby bump, and Mr. Pitt stood beside her — in plaid pants, the kind that our fathers wore in the 70s! Plaid pants! And, yet, all I could say was: Hmm, he makes those plaid pants look pretty good. Which begs the question: Will plaid pants make a comeback?? Wouldn’t THAT be something to see! Can you just imagine JJ with plaid pants peeking merrily out beneath the hem of his alb? That’d be the day! Anyway, I digress…)
So, a new Indiana Jones movie is coming out this summer, entitled “Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull.” Since Harrison Ford is now 65 years old (I know these things!) and wondering what Indiana Jones would REALLY be like at 65, JJ and I came up with this top ten list together. 😉
Top Ten Rejected Indiana Jones Movie Titles
10) Indiana Jones Watches “The Price Is Right”
9) Indiana Jones Loses His Reading Glasses
Eight) Indiana Jones and the IHOP Early Bird Special
(I Had to write out “eight” because if I put “8” next to “)” I get a
8) like this!
7) Indiana Jones Does a Commercial for Cialis
6) Indiana Jones Gets a Hip Replacement
5) Indiana Jones and the Metamucil Catastrophe
4) Indiana Jones meets Wilford Brimley
3) Indiana Jones gets A Touch of Gray
2) Indiana Jones and the Rogue Motorized Scooter (remember the Seinfeld episode with George?)
1) Indiana Jones wakes up, puts in his false teeth, eats his oatmeal, his fiber kicks in, and then he takes a nap.