a success, a concession, and a plan of attack

This morning, Lyd’s first words upon emerging from her room were, “I don’t want to take swimming class with the boy teacher.”

Okay, then…

So this morning was Lyd’s and my complimentary dentisit visit with one of the moms from my music class who is a dentist.  When I mentioned to Lyd at breakfast that we were going to the dentist, she predictably said that she didn’t want to go.  JJ and I had a short discussion in another room about whether we would make her do this or not.  We decided that since this was a medical thing (and we had some concerns about her teeth), that we would make her do this.  So, I played it up as much as possible, telling Lyd, “There will be toys there!  And you’ll get a special treat when you’re all done!”  She still wasn’t excited about it, but the lure of treats intrigued her, and at least she didn’t melt down completely like she did when she saw The Boy Teacher in swimming class.  En route there, I pleased her further by taking the freeway that goes through a short tunnel which she loves, and that helped put her in even more of a pleasant mood.  Best of all, once we got there, we found that they had Digital TV, which meant she could watch her favorite PBS Kids shows in the dentist’s chair!  SCORE!!!  Honestly, THAT made the difference.  My child loves her morning Super Why and Dragontales – what can I say?  I got my teeth cleaned while she sat next to me with her eyes glued on the TV, and then Lyd laid on my lap while the dentist “counted” her teeth, still watching her TV.  Much to my surprise and great relief, Lyd was fantastic.  The dentist said that she was even able to clean her teeth a bit.  Lyd does have a very small cavity, but we’re not going to do anything about it right now, except be extra-vigilant about brushing.  But WE CONQUERED A FEAR!!!!  HALLELUJAH!!!!

We came home to find my neighbor and her daughter playing on the playground, the daughter of which is Lyd’s best friend.  So, she was overjoyed.  Plus, her other best friend, whose mother is our church secretary, was there, too, so Lyd had her two best friends to play with.  She was in heaven!

With all the activity and excitement going on, my anxiety level was pretty low, for which I was thankful.  I gathered my courage and made a phone call to the Park & Rec to talk (and nicely complain again) about the teacher switch in Lyd’s swimming class.  Long story short, I DID complain nicely, but was essentially nicely told “too bad for you.”  I was able to withdraw Lyd and Baby J from their respective classes and get my most of my money back, which I was pleased about.  So, swimming classes are done for us for the summer.  This is too bad, really, because right now as I type this is the time we should be at class, and it is just gorgeous swimming weather outside.  But, Lyd is very visibly relieved about not having to go to swim class with The Boy Teacher, so I think it’s all worth it.  All the people I talked to in the last 24 hours about this situation have said that I shouldn’t force her to go take the class, because there’s a decent chance that this fear could turn into a fear of the water.  So, I’ll just have to try to find some times to take her into the pool on my own.  In fact, tomorrow afternoon we’re invited to a pool party, so that should be fun.  Lyd has already said that if JJ or I are in the pool with her, she will put her head under the water.  So, I think we’ll just teach her swimming on our own.

Overall, my anxiety has been a lot better today as I was quite busy, but my worst times are always around the supper hour and into the evening, so we’ll see what the rest of the day has in store.  I’m not sure what to do as far as treatment goes; I guess I’m just hoping this subsides on its own.  However, not one to just sit on my tush and wait for things to happen, I formulated a plan today, and here’s what I’m going to try to do to deal with this anxiety:

  1. I’m really going to make an effort to nurse Baby J more frequently.  Not only will that be good for Baby J, it will (hopefully) help out my hormones immensely.  I’m going to be consistent about nursing her in our quiet chair up in her nursery, keeping the room darkened and quiet.  I’m also going to try to pump twice during the day, and I’m going to drink up all the Mother’s Milk Tea that’s sitting in my cupboard.  What better time than now to use that tea to boost my milk supply – that’s what it’s for!
  2. I’m going to take advantage of this free homeopathic consulation that a friend of mine won and then gave to me.  A friend I talked to on the phone last night thought that homeopathy might really help me, so I’m going to give it a try.  Hey, it’s free!
  3. I’m going to continue with my plan of going for a walk every morning.  It’s supposed to be a natural serotonin boost.
  4. I’m going to continue going to bed early.  You may have remembered me talking in the past about how I hate going to bed, but somehow this anxiety business has kicked that in the butt.  The harsh and judgemental side of me tells me that I deserve this anxiety and brought it on myself by my long-standing avoidance of sleep.  When I’m being kinder to myself, I say that while that may be partially true, there’s no way that’s totally true.  Baby J’s nursing has really changed dramatically, and I have super-sensitive hormones.  But that said, it won’t hurt anything to get more sleep.  Lately it’s been hard for me to fall asleep when I go to bed, but like my father said when I was a little girl and complained about how I wasn’t falling asleep, “If you can’t sleep, at least rest.”
  5. I’m going to try to eat more protein and drink more water.  My friend, who was my doula with Baby J’s birth, said that the basic recommendations for avoiding or dealing with post-partum depression are: 1) lots of sunshine 2) walks outside 3) lots of protein 4) as much sleep as you can get.  So, we’ll give those a shot.
  6. There’s one more thing that I’m going to do which I’m not going to name.  Those of you mothers with multiple children might have a guess as to what it is.

Well, time to embark on the Emily Witching Hour(s).  Here’s hoping that I don’t have another evening meltdown!