more words, but more screaming

I love my children dearly.  I wouldn’t trade them for the world.

However, Miss Curious J can stop her screaming anytime.

Lyd never went through “terrible two’s” or “terrible three’s.”  I figured this omission was due to the awesome job I was doing at mothering.  For a few years, I felt like quite an expert on parenting.  However, Curious J has cut me down to size, making me realize that I’m an average mother, just like everyone else.  I tell you, this kid has given me a lot more empathy for the vast majority of mothers!

I thought J’s tantruming was getting better.  For a while, it was.  But, now that she has achieved the age of two years, it seems to be coming back, accompanied by an ear-splitting scream.  J wants certain things done certain ways, and when that doesn’t happen, she screams bloody murder.  This is brand-new territory to me, and I’m not quite sure what to do.  But I know I would like the screaming to stop…

Of course, J also has many moments of unbearable cute-ness.  She knows how to sing “Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star,” to recite the alphabet, to count to 12, and of course, she still is adept with her NFL referee signals.  At supper tonight (JJ was gone) she started doing signs such as “Safety!” and “Offsides!”  Very cute.  She’s also picked up a number of the songs from our current Music Together collection and enjoys singing those.  She comes to music class with me at least twice a week, sometimes up to four times a week, so she’s getting at least double the music time than she did before.  It’s making a difference in her musical development, that’s for sure.  But, man, she can be full of hugs and kisses and “I love you’s,” and then be screaming on the floor the next minute.  It’s quite something.

She’s also talking a lot more, and most of the time she willingly imitates what someone says to her.  Perhaps in some way, her burgeoning vocabulary is the underlying cause of the screaming.  I truly believe that she wants to verbalize what it is that she wants, but she doesn’t have the words, so, in frustration, she screams.  I am hoping that as her vocabulary and her ability to apply words to emotions expands, that her tantrums will decrease.  So, when she throws fits, I try to put into words what she’s feeling, hoping that sooner or later, she’ll be able to use those words herself.

Despite my ever-decreasing tolerance for the screaming, I do find it in my heart to empathize with her.  I know how much I like to talk (and write), so I can appreciate how frustrating it must be for a highly intelligent girl like J to not be able to say what she wants to say.  Hopefully, she’ll figure it out soon, so the screaming can end.

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2 thoughts on “more words, but more screaming

  1. I feel for you. I have a screamer too, he’s 4. I know he has allergies and wakes up itchy or with his eyes watering. No fun and I don’t blame him if that is the case, but I have a hard time telling if that is the problem. He also has a lovey, sweet side to him too. 🙂

    But he wakes up mean and whiny, every day. If he screams I place him in his room until he stops crying and can come out and talk to me. If he refuses something I give him, I place it on the table and he can have it when he is ready and I walk away. I figure if he gets no attention during his fits he will realize the I will give him lots of attention when he is talking to me nice.

    I also did a little sign language with the kids when they were little. (please, more, drink/eat, tired) It helped them express what they wanted a little bit.

    I hope your little one grows out of it quickly :). Enjoy the sweet moments.

  2. Oh goodness I can so relate to the screaming! HARK there is HOPE tho! They do grow out of it I promise!

    I remember once my sarcasm kicked in when my son started the screaming. My daughter had her hands over her ears giving him the look! It was either sarcasm or blowing my top choice that day! I said to my daughter, “My goodness do you hear that noise? It sounds like a dying animal! Look out the window to see where its coming from! THAT poor thing!” YES it was my way of showing him he will be ignored if the volume doesn’t lesson! LOL! He finally said to me, “MOMMIE!” “Yes?” When his pitch started to change I started to talk about looking for the dying animal again! My daughter was enjoying the game, and within time he got the message. In the meantime my inner frustration level was lowering as well! THAT is a good thing as well!

    At this point? The child is almost 13, and he still says to me, “Mom do you remember the days of the dying animal?” LOL! I only did a few times, and the rest of the time he got the time outs and room time! I was glad he giggles about it.

    I’m sitting back waiting for the hormones to kick in, and his braincells ooz out his ears with puberty now! Something tells me the screaming fits are easier…sigh! WELL we all have out awesome trips in parenthood don’t we? lololol!

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